Being a parent is harder than what you think. And it's even more complicated if you are flying solo. Imagine taking responsibilities of two persons. That's some difficult job to handle and it's never going to be easy. BUT, it is the most rewarding experience ever in your life.
Let me share to you my short story.
I was young and in love. I gave birth to my tiny munchkin when I was 19 and heaven knows how hard it was for me. I was in college and had to stop. I was ashamed. I disappointed my family and myself. I crushed their hearts and there was nothing I could do. I was hurting too you know? What did I do? I cried. And cried. I felt so hopeless and lost. Basically my relationship with my ex-boyfriend didn't work out as we planned. We had to separate ways and here I am living my life as a single mom and boy am I proud! Yes, proud single mama here!
Proud? Why?? You may ask.
Why not? That's my answer.
I am proud because I am a strong person. I faced my responsibilities and I'm never turning back. I am proud because I am a superhero in the eyes of my child and I am her best friend. She calls me the best mama in the world and that she's proud of me. Should there be any reason not to be proud? I am not a failure because I am living my life and facing all the challenges. There's no reason for me to not be proud of myself. And if you are like me, you should be proud of yourself too! Do not allow negativity in your life.
You know, people will judge you. They always do. Even if you're not a single parent, people will judge you. Maybe that's a human nature. I don't really know. But one thing is for sure, I used to judge people too. We are not perfect and it's okay. But you see, this is one thing I've learned from being a parent: I mind my own business. I don't care about what others think negatively towards me. Do not entertain the thought of them living your life. It's your life, not theirs. They are also humans just like anybody else. They don't have a perfect life just like you. So why be bothered by them?
I am speaking for I am a parent myself. Believe me or not but we can never be the perfect parents we wish to be. Remove that on your goals if in any way it is on your list. My parents weren't perfect. I don't know anybody with perfect parents. We will never be. So what can we be? We can be the BEST. Not the best for everybody but the best parent for your kid. Be there when your child needs you. Listen when he/she has a story to tell. Say sorry when you hurt each other. Be the best friend and the teacher. Honestly, there's not a formula to be the best parent out there. It is for us to figure out and it's a never ending process. So just like you, do not expect your child to be a perfect son/daughter. Admit to yourself that you are human and that you may not be the perfect mom or dad for your child, but you will try to be the best that you can be. Especially if you are a single parent, it's going to be more difficult but your have to be strong.
As a parent, you will fail every now and then. We all will. But what's important is that we are willing to learn. Lessen your expectations or better yet, remove them. Do not expect your child to be a certain person you want him to be. Love your child unconditionally and he will never feel incomplete even if it's only you and your kid against the world.
I hope I got to inspire you even just a little. I am very happy where I am now and I hope you are too. Always remember to stay positive and ignore all the negativities.
I wish you all the best. Have a wonderful day!